It’s been awhile since I last posted. Sure, I’ve been busy on the freelance front, interviewing for upcoming profiles, and reworking the site to accommodate short form content, but mostly I haven’t felt there’s been much to report. I cold call, interview, photograph, write, design, publish, work, code, email, sleep, and eat. Again and again. While I seem to have fallen into a more productive pattern and am spending less time procrastinating and wasting time switching gears, I’m also finding the pattern lackluster and repetitive.
I’ll be the first to admit I’m a pretty fickle person. Probably fickle to a fault. I haven’t lost interest in Polynate or what I’m trying to do with it, and I haven’t stopped believing in its value and possibility. But I will say that the grind of churning out profiles and the repetition that’s involved in constructing them has become less enjoyable. It’s become less a labor of love and more a labor of… labor.
In part, I think this is normal. I think even if you’re chasing your dream, and doing things your way, and forging your own path, and happy to be doing all of it, there will still be times when you’re just going through the motions to get to the next level. Times when the work you’ve created for yourself loses a bit of the shine it first had. Times when what was once exciting, new, and challenging becomes mundane, typical, and predictable. Times when you just need to ride the wave — the highs, the lows, and mostly the in-betweens.